The mean streets of Yuppieville

From an article titled Accused Pad Thai Slapper Found Not Guilty:

The legal protection of self-defense, it seems, has been extended to noodle-related strife.

On Wednesday, Judge ShawnDya Simpson of Manhattan Criminal Court found Marcella Caprario, 37, an opera singer and English-as-a-second-language teacher, not guilty on charges of attempted assault in the third degree and harassment in the second degree.

Below is a representation of Pad Thai that may or may not look like that involved in this clear case of White People’s Problems.

Pad Thai
Noodling in the Second Degree

 

Can you imagine being the victim at the moment this happens?

Between this and Harold Camping losing his ability to speak, it appears miracles may not happen, but there is cosmic justice at times:

Investigators say a man has died while in the act of raping an elderly South Texas woman.

The Refugio (reh-FYOO’-ree-yoh) County Sheriff’s Office identifies the man as 53-year-old Isabel Chavelo Gutierrez. Sheriff’s Sgt. Gary Wright says the incident happened June 2 after he rode two miles by bicycle from his home to that of his 77-year-old victim in the tiny coastal community of Tivoli.

BONUS!

Mayor of Lima, Peru: Jesus Christ, that’s an unoriginal idea

The mayor of Lima has nixed the president’s plans to hoist in her city a really big statue of Jesus Christ — a statue that looks suspiciously like one in Brazil:

The mayor of the Peru’s capital may have spoiled President Alan Garcia’s plans to erect a huge statue of Jesus similar to Brazil’s iconic Christ the Redeemer on a hill overlooking Lima’s Pacific coastline.

Jesus statue
In this June 10, 2011 photo provided by Peru's Presidential Press Office, Peru's President Alan Garcia, second from the left, walks next to the upper section of the "Christ of the Pacific" statue in Chorrillos, Peru.

Lima Mayor Susana Villaran says Garcia didn’t ask her before announcing on Friday his intention to have “Christ of the Pacific” put up for a June 29 inauguration. The statue will be 22 meters (72 feet) high and stand atop a 15-meter (49-foot) base.

Villaran has criticized its suitability and lack of originality – it resembles the famed Rio de Janeiro work.

So true

Or you could announce your candidacy for president in the middle of a presidential candidate debate. The old skool media seem to love news that isn't actually news.

Ouch. My head hurts.

I've become such a lightweight. Way too easily overserved last night at House of Blues. Pretty sure this is how I must have looked when I stumbled in this morning.

Yeah, this’ll work

I don't know about the cats other people have had, but the ones I've had would totally shred everything in sight if I ever put one of these on them.

Well, maybe just this one time, I’ll make an exception

I’m so guilt ridden I would have been sure to turn the printed canvas bag around so everyone couldn’t see what it said.

DontUsePlasticBags
I hope her neighbors shame her when she gets home.

So, so, so, so, so, sooooo like my first grade teacher

When first-graders alliterate:

VeryVeryVery
You have to admire the honesty of kids at this age.

A funny thing about gay bars…

is you can always tell what kind of men the owners are into, just by looking at their adverts:

dBarStopLightParty
Someone's seen too many Bel Ami films.

Crazy Cat Lady: The Early Years

So this is how it all begins:

Nice acting.

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